Jokes About Friends



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You know when I told you the joke about how a friend will help you move, but a real friend will help you move a body? I was only kidding. Brad Thor
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I will never joke about old soldiers who try to get to reunions to talk over the war again. To talk of old times with old friends is the greatest thing in the world. Will Rogers
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My friends are people who like building cool stuff. We always have this joke about people who want to just start companies without making something valuable. There's a lot of that in Silicon Valley. Mark Zuckerberg
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Don't make jokes about food. David Lean
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The funniest jokes you know aren't from comics but relatives, friends - from your life. That's the funniest stuff. Dick Gregory
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I used to watch 'Coming to America' every day after school. I have full-on long-running inside jokes with friends and family about different scenes in that movie alone. Also, my brother and I loved 'The Golden Child,' so, yeah: I was a huge fan of Eddie Murphy growing up. Gabourey Sidibe
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The way I figured it, keeping quiet was safe. Words could betray you if you chose the wrong ones, or mean less if you used too many. Jokes could be grandly miscalculated, or stories deemed boring, and I'd learned early on that my sense of humor and ideas about what sorts of things were fascinating didn't exactly overlap with my friends. Robyn
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I don't find the same things funny that many other people seem to find funny. I don't really respond to sex jokes and things like that. Some of my friends look at me and go, "Come on, Nic, that was my best joke. Why aren't you laughing?" I go, "I really don't know why I'm not laughing. I'm sort of out of sync with it." So I'd have to find something that was really about weird human behavior for me to laugh. Nicolas Cage
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Let me say this. [Donald] Trump is the only person that has control over what Trump does. Maybe his supporters support him but they don't support every single thing about him. Maybe they are misguided about what it means to be friends with Russia. Maybe they come to my show and they never thought about sexism in the way that I talk about it in a joke. Jen Kirkman
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As soon as a roast is announced, I get everybody - family, friends, waitresses, cab drivers - giving me jokes about the person getting roasted. I'm the mouthpiece for the masses. Jeff Ross
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There have always been jokes all over our songs; I originally started writing lyrics to make my friends crack a smile, which is difficult. Alex Turner
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I made some jokes about weed, got some laughs, made some more jokes, got some more laughs; next thing you know, I'm telling a lot of jokes about it. Doug Benson
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In your thirties, you're much more comfortable with sex. First of all, sex is something you've done more. You know you can have sex just to have sex; you can have sex with friends; you can have sex with people you love; you can have sex with people you don't like, but the sex is good. And you can joke about sex much more. Julie Delpy
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I love to write jokes and that's all I think about. Rita Rudner
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I don't really care for, like, fat jokes about women, specifically. Sarah Silverman
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Most of my jokes are racist - usually about the Irish. Frank Carson
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Johnny Carson started the jokes about me and Marlin in his monologues. Jim Fowler
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You can make jokes but [ George Clooney] is everything that anyone's ever said about him. John Krasinski
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My friends joke that I'm dead until I get onstage. I'm dead right now as you're speaking to me. Lady Gaga
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She laughed when there was no joke. She danced when there was no music. She had no friends, yet she was the friendliest person in school. Jerry Spinelli
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