George Carlin Quotes



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No one is ever more him/herself than when they really laugh. Their defenses are down. It's very Zen-like, that moment. They are completely open. George Carlin
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I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? George Carlin
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Think off-center. George Carlin
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Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that's twice as big as it needs to be. George Carlin
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Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy. George Carlin
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Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it. George Carlin
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Everything beeps now. George Carlin
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The planet isn't going anywhere. We are. George Carlin
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I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. George Carlin
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He is dead now, but he meant well. George Carlin
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Leadership camp? Isn't that where Hitler went? George Carlin
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Most people are not particularly good at anything. George Carlin
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You never see a smiling runner. George Carlin
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I'm 63 now. But that's just 17 Celsius. George Carlin
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Mother's milk leads to everything. George Carlin
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