Funny Quotes About Hell



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I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places. Mark Twain
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The thing I don't get about paedophilia... Why the hell do kids find old men in dirty raincoats so sexy? Frankie Boyle
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From the moment I was six I felt sexy. And let me tell you it was hell, sheer hell, waiting to do something about it. Bette Davis
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About as close you can get to the perfect cerebral thriller: searingly smart, ridiculously funny, and fast as hell... I defy anybody to read the first page and not keep going to the last. Lev Grossman
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I was about half in love with her by the time we sat down. That's the thing about girls. Every time they do something pretty... you fall half in love with them, and then you never know where the hell you are. J D Salinger
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Maybe this world is another planet's hell. Aldous Huxley
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It's hot as hell as can be. Eugene Ormandy
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Where the hell is Australia anyway? Britney Spears
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I had someone at the Houston police station shoot me with heroin so I could do a story about it. The experience was a special kind of hell. I came out understanding full well how one could be addicted to 'smack,' and quickly. Dan Rather
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I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell? Dan Castellaneta
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I immediately went out and bought a book on anger management. And now I have that book, and I don't know if I'll get to the book. But I'm certainly excited about the day where I can't find the book, and I get to say, 'Where the hell is my anger management book?!' Marc Maron
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An Inuit hunter asked the local missionary priest: If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell? No, said the priest, not if you did not know. Then why, asked the Inuit earnestly, did you tell me? Annie Dillard
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Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company. Mark Twain
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Men at most differ as Heaven and Earth, but women, worst and best, as Heaven and Hell. Alfred Lord Tennyson
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It is good to have friends both in Heaven and Hell. George Herbert
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Football is easy if you're crazy as hell. Bo Jackson
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I think a lot of people who watch TV don't realize when they're watch TV shows and it says 'produced by' and producer, producer... there are all these producers. What the hell does a producer do? It's funny how much you have to worry about as a producer. Demetri Martin
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When I had my Comedy Central roast, David [Spade] was my first choice to be roastmaster, because I adore him. He's funny as hell, and nobody is meaner. Rob Lowe
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I never did give anybody hell. I just told the truth and they thought it was hell. Harry S Truman
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This thought-provoking novel portrays the absurdity of our overbearing government bureaucracy with a story that is entertaining and fast-paced. The Taxman Cometh will become part of our national dialogue about taxes and freedom. And it's funny as hell. Author Jim Greenfield is a cross between Ayn Rand and Monty Python. If enough people read this hilarious 'man versus state' book, the IRS will be put out of business, which is okay with me. Grover Norquist
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