Funny Old Sayings



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A wise saying is something you keep picking up off the floor in front of your fridge Robert Breault
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Old Madame du Deffand and her friends talked for fifty years without stopping. And of it all, what remains? Perhaps three witty sayings. So that we are at liberty to suppose either that nothing was said, or that nothing witty was said, or that the fraction of three witty sayings lasted eighteen thousand two hundred and fifty nights, which does not leave a liberal allowance of wit for any one of them. Virginia Woolf
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You know you're getting old when everything hurts. And what doesn't hurt doesn't work. Hy Gardner
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One compensation of old age is that it excuses you from picnics. William Feather
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I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do. Phyllis Diller
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If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people. Jim Eason
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If you want to look young and thin on your birthday. Hang around a bunch of old fat people. Anthony
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You're birthday reminds me of the old Chinese scholar..... Yung No Mo Dana Rosemary Scallon
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Don't let aging get you down. It's too hard to get back up. John Wagner
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If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes. Euripides
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If you survive long enough, you're revered-rather like an old building. Katharine Hepburn
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Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough. Groucho Marx
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People ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit. George Burns
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Old age takes away from us what we have inherited and gives us what we have earned. Gerald Brenan
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This wine is forty years old. It certainly doesn't show its age. Marcus Tullius Cicero
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The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet. Robert Orben
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It's a funny old world. A man's lucky if he gets out of it alive. W C Fields
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For those who believe in the quote, Laughter is the best medicine and are looking for a divorce quote on the lighter side, the following divorce sayings range from mildly humorous to outrageously funny: Men are just like a book - with a beginning, middle and an end. Pamela Anderson
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The advantage of being eighty years old is that one has many people to love. Jean Renoir
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Act your age, not your shoe size. Prince
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