Funny Neighborhood Quotes



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I think those neighborhood signs that say 'slow children playing' are mean. Zach Galifianakis
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I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot. Chris Rock
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I'd worship the ground you walked on if only you walked in a better neighborhood. Billy Wilder
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Every man is surrounded by a neighborhood of voluntary spies. Jane Austen
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I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand. Rodney Dangerfield
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I parked in the tow-away zone, and when I got back, the entire neighborhood was gone. Steven Wright
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I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers. Rodney Dangerfield
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I don't miss much about my childhood. I lived in a good neighborhood, a wacky neighborhood. It was a very boy-heavy neighborhood - kind of Lord of the Flies-y. So many weird things happened, funny things. Justin Theroux
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There's a store in my neighborhood called Futon World. I like that name, 'Futon World.' Makes me think of a magical place that gets less and less comfortable over time. Demetri Martin
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I'd like to do a reality show with four white people...who are dropped off in a really bad black neighborhood. And the show would be called...Cracker Hunt. Zach Galifianakis
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I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it. Rodney Dangerfield
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I longed for funny stories about the sort of children who lived in my neighborhood. Beverly Cleary
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I worried about playing God (in the movie Oh God). We're about the same age, but we grew up in different neighborhoods. George Burns
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Natural gas is hemispheric. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods. George W Bush
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I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark. Dick Gregory
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I just thought everybody lived around abandoned buildings and crack-heads, ... I lived in the ghetto until I was like 19. I came to Los Angeles, stayed at hotels and stuff. When I got back and I saw what my neighborhood looked like, I started getting scared. Chris Rock
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I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land. Jon Stewart
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I don't know that there are real ghosts and goblins, But there are always more trick-or-treaters than neighborhood kids. Robert Breault
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We need to take responsibility and educate people. That's why black folks don't like me. I always say it's our responsibility to make safe neighborhoods. It's our job to get them cleaned up. Charles Evers
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No matter how you care to define it, I do not identify with the local group. Planet, species, race, nation, state, religion, party, union, club, association, neighborhood improvement committee; I have no interest in any of it. I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to. George Carlin
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