Mark Twain Quotes & Wallpapers

Mark Twain
Total Quotes: 2961


I could be an idiot, or I can serve in Congress, but I repeat myself. Mark Twain
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To be vested with enormous authority is a fine thing; but to have the on-looking world consent to it is finer. Mark Twain
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When angry, count to a hundred. Mark Twain
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Reputation is a hall-mark: it can remove doubt from pure silver, and it can also make the plated article pass for pure. Mark Twain
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I will gradually drop this subject of graveyards. I have been trying all I could to get down to the sentimental part of it, but I cannot accomplish it. I think there is no genuinely sentimental part to it. It is all grotesque, ghastly, horrible. Mark Twain
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There are people who can do all fine and heroic things but one: keep from telling their happinesses to the unhappy. Mark Twain
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There are many scapegoats for our sins, but the most popular is providence. Mark Twain
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Even the clearest and most perfect circumstantial evidence is likely to be at fault, after all, and therefore ought to be received with great caution. Take the case of any pencil, sharpened by any woman; if you have witnesses, you will find she did it with a knife; but if you take simply the aspect of the pencil, you will say that she did it with her teeth. Mark Twain
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One gains at least two to three times more experience grabbing the tiger by the tail than reading about it in a book. Mark Twain
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To gnaw on is human, towards digest, divine. Mark Twain
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If ever you've been down in the dumps, hear these iconic authors share with you more than their writing wisdom. Mark Twain
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Do your duty today and repent tomorrow. Mark Twain
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Presbyterianism without infant damnation would be like the dog on the train that couldn't be identified because it had lost its tag. Mark Twain
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When one's character begins to fall under suspicion and disfavor, how swift, then, is the work of disintegration and destruction. Mark Twain
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I speak French with timidity, and not flowingly-except when excited. When using that language I have often noticed that I have hardly ever been mistaken for a Frenchman, except, perhaps, by horses; never, I believe, by people. Mark Twain
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Demagogue-a vessel containing beer and other liquids. Mark Twain
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Geological time is not money. Mark Twain
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We can't always have the beautiful aspect of things. Let us make the most of our sights that are beautiful and let the others go Mark Twain
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I have been reading the morning paper. I do it every morning-knowing well that I shall find in it the usual depravities and basenesses and hypocrisies and cruelties that make up civilization, and cause me to put in the rest of the day pleading for the damnation of the human race. I cannot seem to get my prayers answered, yet I do not despair. Mark Twain
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There is no salvation for us but to adopt Civilization and lift ourselves down to its level. Mark Twain
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The peoples furthest from civilization are the ones where equality between man and woman are furthest apart-and we consider this one of the signs of savagery. Mark Twain
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Strip the human race, absolutely naked, and it would be a real democracy. But the introduction of even a rag of tiger skin, or a cowtail, could make a badge of distinction and be the beginning of a monarchy. Mark Twain
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The secret of making progress is to get started. Mark Twain
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Experience is an author's most valuable asset; experience is the thing that puts the muscle and the breath and the warm blood into the book he writes. Mark Twain
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Saturday morning was come, and all the summer world was bright and fresh, and brimming with life. There was a song in every heart; and if the heart was young, the music issued at the lips. There was cheer in every face and a spring in every step. The locust-trees were in bloom, and the fragrance of the blossoms filled the air. Cardiff Hill, beyond the village and above, it was green with vegetation, and it lay just far enough away to seem a Delectable Land, dreamy, reposeful, and inviting. Mark Twain
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His head was an hour-glass; it could stow an idea, but it had to do it a grain at a time, not the whole idea at once. Mark Twain
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One should never use exclamation points in writing. It is like laughing at your own joke. Mark Twain
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There is nothing training can't cannot do. Nothing is above its reach. Mark Twain
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But the elastic heart of youth cannot be compressed into one constrained shape long at a time. Mark Twain
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Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience. Mark Twain
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It is better to be alone than unwelcome. - Eve Mark Twain
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I am only human, although I regret it. Mark Twain
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I have seen slower people than I am and more deliberate... and even quieter, and more listless, and lazier people than I am. But they were dead. Mark Twain
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Give every day the chance to become the most beautiful day of your life. Mark Twain
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A great, great deal has been said about the weather, but very little has ever been done. Mark Twain
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Don't wait the time is never just right. Mark Twain
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Love heightens all senses - except the common. Mark Twain
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But old fools is the biggest fools there is. Mark Twain
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Is the human race a joke? Was it devised and patched together in a dull time when there was nothing important to do? Mark Twain
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We need not worry so much about what man descends from; it's what he descends to that shames the human race. Mark Twain
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A good legible label is usually worth, for information, a ton of significant attitude and expression in a historical picture. Mark Twain
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We Americans worship the almighty dollar! Well, it is a worthier god than Heredity Privilege. Mark Twain
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To my mind that literature is best and most enduring which is characterized by a noble simplicity. Mark Twain
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Man is the only creature who has a nasty mind. Mark Twain
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The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog. Mark Twain
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Let us draw the curtain of charity over the rest of this scene Mark Twain
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Behind every successful man, there is a woman - And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two. Mark Twain
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A good lawyer knows the law; a clever one takes the judge to lunch. Mark Twain
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The secret of getting ahead is getting started Mark Twain
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I admire him, I frankly confess it; and when his time is come I shall buy a piece of the rope for a keepsake. Mark Twain
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Supposing is good, but finding out is better. Mark Twain
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When one has tasted watermelon he knows what the angels eat. Mark Twain
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We adore titles and heredities in our hearts and ridicule them with our mouths. This is our democratic privilege. Mark Twain
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All gods are better than their reputation. Mark Twain
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More than once I have been humiliated by my resemblance to God the father; He is always longing for the love of His children and trying to get it on the cheapest and laziest terms He can invent. Mark Twain
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But we love the Old Travelers. We love to hear them prate and drivel and lie. Mark Twain
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Don't just sit there and worry. Be proactive. Do something - anything - about what's worrying you so you can gain information, focus and control over the situation. I've suffered a great many catastrophes in my life. Most of them never happened. Mark Twain
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When your opinions start to coincide with those of the majority, it is time to reconsider your opinions. Mark Twain
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I was educated once - it took me years to get over it. Mark Twain
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The writing begins when you"ve finished. Only then do you know what you're trying to say. Mark Twain
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In our day we don't allow a hundred and thirty years to elapse between glimpses of a marvel. If somebody should discover a creek in the county next to the one that the North Pole is in, Europe and America would start fifteen costly expeditions thither; one to explore the creek, and the other fourteen to hunt for each other. Mark Twain
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This editor is a critic. He has pulled out his carving-knife and his tomahawk and is starting after a book which he is going to have for breakfast. Mark Twain
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That is a society editor, sitting there elegantly dressed, with his legs crossed in that indolent way, observing the clothes the ladies wear, so that he can describe them for his paper and make them out finer than they are and get bribes for it and become wealthy. Mark Twain
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We have an insanity plea that would have saved Cain. Mark Twain
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You see, he knew his own laws just as other people so often know the laws: by words, not by effects. They take a meaning, and get to be very vivid, when you come to apply them to yourself. Mark Twain
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An American has not seen the United States until he has seen Mardi-Gras in New Orleans. Mark Twain
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The cigar-box which the European calls a 'lift' needs but to be compared with our elevators to be appreciated. The lift stops to reflect between floors. That is all right in a hearse, but not in elevators. The American elevator acts like a man's patent purge-it works. Mark Twain
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God cures and the doctor sends the bill. Mark Twain
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Ignorance is not, not knowing something. It is knowing what isn't so. Mark Twain
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Of course, no man is entirely in his right mind at any time. Mark Twain
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