Mark Twain Quotes & Wallpapers

Mark Twain
Total Quotes: 2961


I am always on the side of the revolutionists, because there never was a revolution unless there were some oppressive and intolerable conditions against which to revolute. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

It is agreed, in this country, that if a man can arrange his religion so that it perfectly satisfies his conscience, it is not incumbent on him to care whether the arrangement is satisfactory to anyone else or not. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Only a government that is rich and safe can afford to be a democracy, for democracy is the most expensive and nefarious kind of government ever heard of on earth Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

If to be interesting is to be uncommonplace, it is becoming a question, with me, if there are any commonplace people Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

I'm merely running some errands. This is now off the record. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

The funniest things are the forbidden. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

So you see, the quality of humor is not a personal or a national monopoly. It's as free as salvation, and, I am afraid, far more widely distributed. But it has its value, I think. The hard and sordid things of life are too hard and too sordid and too cruel for us to know and touch them year after year without some mitigating influence, some kindly veil to draw over them, from time to time, to blur the craggy outlines, and make the thorns less sharp and the cruelties less malignant. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Information appears to stew out of me naturally, like the precious otter of roses out of the otter. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

What a world of trouble those who never marry escape! There are many happy matches, it is true, and sometimes "my dear," and "my love" come from the heart; but what sensible bachelor, rejoicing in his freedom and years of discretion, will run the tremendous risk? Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Men and women - even man and wife are foreigners. Each has reserves that the other cannot enter into, nor understand. These have the effect of frontiers. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

...majority Patriotism is the customary Patriotism. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

There is no unhappiness like the misery of sighting land (and work) again after a cheerful, careless voyage. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

As soon as a man recognizes that he has drifted into age, he gets reminiscent. He wants to talk and talk; and not about the present or the future, but about his old times. For there is where the pathos of his life lies - and the charm of it. The pathos of it is there because it was opulent with treasures that are gone, and the charm of it is in casting them up from the musty ledgers and remembering how rich and gracious they were. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Man has been here 32,000 years. That it took a hundred million years to prepare the world for him is proof that that is what it was done for. I suppose it is, I dunno. If The Eiffel Tower were now to represent the world's age, the skin of paint on the pinnacle knob at its summit would represent man's share of that age; and anybody would perceive that the skin was what the tower was built for. I reckon they would, I dunno. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Our Bible reveals to us the character of our god with minute and remorseless exactness... It is perhaps the most damnatory biography that exists in print anywhere. It makes Nero an angel of light and leading by contrast. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

The average American's simplest and commonest form of breakfast consists of coffee and beefsteak. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Never let formal education get in the way of your learning. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

But we are all insane, anyway ... The suicides seem to be the only sane people. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

An open mind leaves a chance for someone to drop a worthwhile thought in it. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

I am an anti-imperialist. I am opposed to having the eagle put its talons on any other land. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

The law of work seems unfair, but nothing can change it; the more enjoyment you get out of your work, the more money you will make. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Optimist: Person who travels on nothing from nowhere to happiness. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

That is a simple rule, and easy to remember. When I, a thoughtful and unblessed Presbyterian, examine the Koran, I know that beyond any question every Mohammedan is insane; not in all things, but in religious matters. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Nothing incites to money-crimes like great poverty or great wealth. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

We write frankly and freely, but then we modify before we print. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Had double chins all the way down to his stomach. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

His ignorance covers the world like a blanket, and there's scarcely a hole in it anywhere. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

The man who sets out to carry a cat by its tail learns something that will always be useful and which never will grow dim or doubtful. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear. So many look to eradicate fear from their lives, when that is an impossible task. You can certainly experience moments in absence of fear, however accept that fear will be with you whenever you are in the process of living creatively. The challenge is to go ahead regardless, simply notice the feeling and manage being courageous. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

All my life I have been honest-comparatively honest. I could never use money I had not made honestly-I could only lend it. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Medicine has made all its progress during the past fifty years. ... How many operations that are now in use were known fifty years ago?-they were not operations, they were executions. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

I have been scientifically studying the traits and dispositions of the "lower animals" (so-called,) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result profoundly humiliating to me. For it obliges me to renounce my allegiance to the Darwinian theory of the Ascent of Man from the Lower Animals; since it now seems plain to me that that theory ought to be vacated in favor of a new and truer one, this new and truer one to be named the Descent of Man from the Higher Animals. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Strange a God who mouths Golden Rules and forgiveness, then invented hell; who mouths morals to other people and has none Himself; who frowns upon crimes yet commits them all; who created man without invitation, then tries to shuffle the responsibility for man's acts upon man, instead of honorably placing it where it belongs, upon Himself; and finally with altogether divine obtuseness, invites this poor, abused slave to worship Him! Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

If you have nothing to say, say nothing. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Jesus died to save men - a small thing for an immortal to do - and didn't save many, anyway. But if he had been damned for the race, that would have been act of a size proper to a god, and would have saved the whole race. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Unused talents gives you no advantage over someone who has no talent at all. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

That's the difference between governments and individuals. Governments don't care, individuals do. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

He wa'n't no common dog, he wa'n't no mongrel; he was a composite. A composite dog is a dog that is made up of all the valuable qualities that's in the dog breed-kind of a syndicate; and a mongrel is made up of all riffraff that's left over. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

The old Irish when immersing a babe at baptism left out the right arm so that it would remain pagan for good fighting Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

If the desire to kill and the opportunity to kill came always together, who would escape hanging? Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

It takes me a long time to lose my temper, but once lost I could not find it with a dog. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

That cat will write her autograph all over your leg if you let her. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

What's the use you learning to do right , when it's troublesome to do right and it ain't no trouble to do wrong, and the wages is just the same? Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

For instance, take this sample: he has imagined a heaven, and has left entirely out of it the supremest of all his delights, the one ecstasy that stands first and foremost in the heart of every individual of his race - and of ours - sexual intercourse!It is as if a lost and perishing person in a roasting desert should be told by a rescuer he might choose and have all longed-for things but one, and he should elect to leave out water! Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Eventually, I sickened of people, myself included, who didn't think enough of themselves to make something of themselves- people who did only what they had to and never what they could have done. I learned from them the infected loneliness that comes at the end of every misspent day. I knew I could do better. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

I saw a startling sight today, a politician with his hands in his own pockets. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

He had the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that but the really great make you feel that you too can become great. When you are seeking to bring big plans to fruition it is important with whom you regularly associate. Hang out with friends who are like-minded and who are also designing purpose-filled lives. Similarly be that kind of a friend for your friends. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

If you want to change the future, you must change what you're doing in the present. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

I was born with Halley's Comet and I expect to die upon its return Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

We had the sky up there, all speckled with stars, and we used to lay on our backs and look up at them, and discuss about whether they was made, or only just happened - Jim he allowed they was made, but I allowed they happened; I judged it would have took too long to make so many. Jim said the moon could a laid them; well that looked kind of reasonable, so I didn't say nothing against it, because I've seen a frog lay most as many, so of course It could be done. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

In a museum in Havana, there are two skulls of Christopher Columbus, one when he was a boy and one when he was a man Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

The less there is to justify a traditional custom, the harder it is to get rid of it Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Humor is tragedy plus time. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Names are not always what they seem. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

High and fine literature is wine, and mine is only water; but everybody likes water. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

All men have heard of the Mormon Bible, but few except the "elect" have seen it, or, at least, taken the trouble to read it. I brought away a copy from Salt Lake. The book is a curiosity to me, it is such a pretentious affair, and yet so "slow," so sleepy; such an insipid mess of inspiration. It is chloroform in print. If Joseph Smith composed this book, the act was a miracle - keeping awake while he did it was, at any rate. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

There is no such thing as a new idea. We simply take a lot of old ideas and put them into a sort of mental kaleidoscope. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

But old fools is the biggest fools there is. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Is the human race a joke? Was it devised and patched together in a dull time when there was nothing important to do? Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

We need not worry so much about what man descends from; it's what he descends to that shames the human race. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

A good legible label is usually worth, for information, a ton of significant attitude and expression in a historical picture. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

We Americans worship the almighty dollar! Well, it is a worthier god than Heredity Privilege. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

To my mind that literature is best and most enduring which is characterized by a noble simplicity. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Man is the only creature who has a nasty mind. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

Duties are not performed for duty's sake, but because their neglect would make the man uncomfortable. A man performs but one duty - the duty of contenting his spirit, the duty of making himself agreeable to himself. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

If you send a damned fool to St. Louis, and you don't tell them he's a damned fool, they'll never find out. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

I wrote 'Tom Sawyer' and 'Huck Finn' for adults exclusively, and it always distressed me when I find that boys and girls have been allowed access to them. The mind that becomes soiled in youth can never again be washed clean. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:

In all the ages the Roman Church has owned slaves, bought and sold slaves, authorized and encouraged her children to trade in them. . . . There were the texts; there was no mistaking their meaning; . . . she was doing in all this thing what the Bible had mapped out for her to do. So unassailable was her position that in all the centuries she had no word to say against human slavery. Mark Twain
Download Wallpaper:



<< PREVIOUS PAGE Page 12 of 43 | NEXT PAGE >
1   2   3   4   5   6   7   8   9   10   11   12   13   14   15   16   17   18   19   20   21   22   23   24   25   26   27   28   29   30   31   32   33   34   35   36   37   38   39   40   41   42   43  


RELATED TOPICS

Abyss Quote Mark Twain, Advertising Mark Twain Quote, Mark Twain Quotes, Dog Quotes Mark Twain, Education Mark Twain Quotes, Famous Quotes Mark Twain, Favorite Quotes Mark Twain, Funny Quotes Mark Twain, History Mark Twain Quotes, Inspirational Quotes Mark Twain, Majority Mark Twain Quote,