Erma Bombeck Quotes & Wallpapers

Erma Bombeck
Total Quotes: 363

If the nest is truly empty, who owns all this junk? Erma Bombeck

Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket. Erma Bombeck

Those magazine dieting stories always have the testimonial of a woman who wore a dress that could slipcover New Jersey in one photo and thirty days later looked like a well-dressed thermometer. Erma Bombeck

I'm going to stop punishing my children by saying, "Never mind! I'll do it myself. Erma Bombeck

Grandmas can shed the yoke of responsibility, relax and enjoy their grandchildren in a way that was not possible when they were raising their own children. And they can glow in the realisation that here is their seed of life that will harvest generations to come. Erma Bombeck

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. Erma Bombeck

Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other. Erma Bombeck

Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence. Erma Bombeck

A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday. Erma Bombeck

I was too old for a paper route, too young for Social Security and too tired for an affair. Erma Bombeck

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. Erma Bombeck

House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad. Erma Bombeck

Never loan your car to anyone to whom you've given birth. Erma Bombeck

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Erma Bombeck Quotes,