Ellen Degeneres Quotes & Wallpapers

Ellen Degeneres
Total Quotes: 402


For me, it's that I contributed, ... That I'm on this planet doing some good and making people happy. That's to me the most important thing, that my hour of television is positive and upbeat and an antidote for all the negative stuff going on in life. Ellen Degeneres
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I see those picketers, and I think you know, if I weren't a loving, non-violent, spiritual person, I would really go over there and grab those signs and smash them over their heads and shove them up their asses. But...I'm a loving, spiritual person. Ellen Degeneres
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Haters are my motivators Ellen Degeneres
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There are all sorts of books offering advice on how to deal with life-threatening situations, but where's the advice on dealing with embarrassing ones? Ellen Degeneres
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Actually this is really funny - one time she accidentally forgot to leave a note and I had no idea she had even moved. I was living in the house with a beautiful Mexican family for three months before I realized they weren't my cousins visiting from out of town. They were so nice. They called me "Quien es, quien es," which I thought was a beautiful name. Ellen Degeneres
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Start thinking positively. You will notice a difference. Instead of 'I think I'm a loser,' try 'I definitely am a loser.' Stop being wishy-washy about things! How much more of a loser can you be if you don't even know you are one? Either you are a loser or you are not. Which is it, stupid? Ellen Degeneres
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I don't know what people are scared of...maybe they think their children will be influenced by gay marriage, but I've got to tell you, I was raised by two heterosexuals. Everywhere I looked - heterosexuals. And they did not influence me. It's time we love people for who they are and let them love who they want. Ellen Degeneres
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True beauty is not related to what color your hair is or what color your eyes are. True beauty is about who you are as a human being, your principles, your moral compass. Ellen Degeneres
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My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada. Ellen Degeneres
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Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer. Ellen Degeneres
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I had everything I'd hoped for, but I wasn't being myself. So I decided to be honest about who I was. It was strange: The people who loved me for being funny suddenly didn't like me for being... me. Ellen Degeneres
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The world is full of a lot of fear and a lot of negativity, and a lot of judgment. I just think people need to start shifting into joy and happiness. As corny as it sounds, we need to make a shift. Ellen Degeneres
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I'm so unfamiliar with the gym, I call it James! Ellen Degeneres
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Procrastination is not the problem. It is the solution. Procrastinate now, don't put it off. Ellen Degeneres
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No matter how popular you are as a stand-up - you can go out and fill a 10,000-seat arena and be smart and funny - it's delicate to host an awards show and know where your place is and know that it's not about you, that it's about the people who are nominated, and respect that, but at the same time have your moment to show them who you are. Ellen Degeneres
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I have an amazing team; I have amazing producers; I have amazing writers,;but at the end of it, it's me making the decisions on the writing, the tone, the editing. Ellen Degeneres
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I was coming home from kindergarten - well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves. Ellen Degeneres
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I think anybody who wants to be president has to be a politician, but I would like to find somebody who's coming from a loving place instead of a political place. Ellen Degeneres
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I know that every time I list something that I am, I am potentially alienating a whole group of people. Publicists and managers will encourage you not to say what political party you belong to, what you eat, what you don't eat, who you sleep with and all that stuff. Ellen Degeneres
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I love furniture. And I thought, why are we not seeing who's making the cool new coffee table and these new designs that come out? Ellen Degeneres
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I had done a sitcom and a movie and hosted the Emmys, and all of a sudden, I lost everything. As someone put it at the time, I was suddenly like a Ferrari in neutral. Ellen Degeneres
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There are people out there hiding all kinds of things. People who have all this success and all this fame and all this money, and yet there are secrets that they think if we found out about, it would be over for them. And it's a horrible way to live whether you're famous or not. Ellen Degeneres
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The song 'If I Had a Hammer' is geared toward people who don't have a hammer. Maybe before I had a hammer I thought I'd hammer in the morning and hammer in the evening. But once you get a hammer, you find you don't really hammer as much as you thought you would. Ellen Degeneres
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I've always said, I like my coffee like I like my men... I don't drink coffee. Ellen Degeneres
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I think there's a whole bunch of things that go along with being a girl. You're not supposed to have opinions or be tough or strong. You're supposed to be soft and vulnerable, and I find those qualities important in both men and women. Ellen Degeneres
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Come on, if you don't win tonight it doesn't mean you're not a good person, it just means you're not a good actor. Ellen Degeneres
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I don't need a baby growing inside me for nine months. For one thing, there's morning sickness. If I'm going to feel nauseous and achy when I wake up, I want to achieve that state the old fashioned way: getting good and drunk the night before. Ellen Degeneres
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Friends will write me letters. They run out of room on the front of the letter. They write over on the bottom of the letter. Like I'm that much of a moron. Like I need that there. Because if it wasn't there, I'd get to the bottom of the page: And so Kathy and I went shopping and we... That's the craziest thing! I don't know why she would just end it that way. Ellen Degeneres
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I had a really tough time for a few years. My show was gone. My phone wasn't ringing. There wasn't one job offer. And at that point, I thought I knew for sure that I wouldn't work in Hollywood again. Ellen Degeneres
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I get paid very well for an amazing, amazing life. I'm blessed. Ellen Degeneres
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For a long time I thought I knew for sure who I was. I grew up in New Orleans and became a comedian. And there was everything that came along with that. The nightclubs. The smoking. The drinking. Then I turned 13. Ellen Degeneres
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There are "well-known secrets" out there and there are people who are "so happy they could die." Sometimes people are so sad they have to laugh and sometimes things feel so wrong, they"re right. Basically what I'm saying is, I usually do' know what people are talking about. Ellen Degeneres
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The world is filled with negativity. I want people to watch me and think, "I feel good, and I'm going to make somebody else feel good today. Ellen Degeneres
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Normally, I try not to pay attention to my haters, but this time I'd like to talk about it, because my haters are my motivators. Ellen Degeneres
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There's nothing I know for sure, because I know for sure that things change. Ellen Degeneres
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Standup is more me talking the entire time. There's definitely an exchange of energy because that room, that audience, is giving back. Ellen Degeneres
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Save a life this Thanksgiving, and join me in starting a new tradition by adopting a turkey instead of eating one through Farm Sanctuary's Adopt-A-Turkey Project. Ellen Degeneres
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I think what saved me is me being honest. I think I somewhow had the courage to do something and say something that I knew would possibly end my career. Instead of making business more important I made my soul and my life more important. And I think by being truthful, and being honest, that saved me. Ellen Degeneres
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I cannot imagine not going home to animals. They are the closest thing to God; they don't harbor resentment. I wanted to be a vet when I grew up. Ellen Degeneres
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I really don't think I need buns of steel. I'd be happy with buns of cinnamon. Ellen Degeneres
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Please raise your children with love and non-judgement. Tell them everyone has the right to love who they want to love. It shouldn't threaten you or who you are. Ellen Degeneres
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I wonder what will happen if i put a hand cream on my feet, will they get confused and start clapping? Ellen Degeneres
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Sometimes the greatest things are the most embarrassing. Ellen Degeneres
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Beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. It's about knowing and accepting who you are. Ellen Degeneres
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It makes a big difference in your life when you stay positive. Ellen Degeneres
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It's funny how cucumber water can taste so much better than pickle juice, even though they come from the same source. Ellen Degeneres
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Why is it that when you wipe up dust its called dusting but when you wipe up a spill its not called spilling? Just something to think about. Ellen Degeneres
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So many people prefer to live in drama because it's comfortable. It's like someone staying in a bad marriage or relationship - it's actually easier to stay because they know what to expect every day, versus leaving and not knowing what to expect. Ellen Degeneres
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I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her. Ellen Degeneres
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I am saddened by how people treat one another and how we are so shut off from one another and how we judge one another, when the truth is, we are all one connected thing. We are all from the same exact molecules. Ellen Degeneres
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Have you ever heard somebody sing some lyrics that you've never sung before, and you realize you've never sung the right words in that song? You hear them and all of a sudden you say to yourself, 'Life in the Fast Lane?' That's what they're saying right there? You think, 'why have I been singing 'wipe in the vaseline?' how many people have heard me sing 'wipe in the vaseline?' I am an idiot. Ellen Degeneres
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I'm on the patch right now. Where it releases small dosages of approval until I no longer crave it, and then I'm gonna rip it off. Ellen Degeneres
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People give me such a hard time because I don't wear dresses. What's that got to do with anything? Ellen Degeneres
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I wanted to have money; I wanted to be special; I wanted people to like me; I wanted to be famous. Ellen Degeneres
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I collect old portraits. They're all just interesting pictures of people, and you just kind of wonder who they were and what they were. There's a guy - I don't know who he is, but he's wearing a suit. He's got his arms folded, and he looks like he sold insurance or something. I'm just wondering why someone painted him. Ellen Degeneres
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I was raised around heterosexuals, as all heterosexuals are, that's where us gay people come from... you heterosexuals. Ellen Degeneres
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I love clothes, so when I wear clothes, they're usually somebody's. You know, I'm not wearing Kmart. Ellen Degeneres
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For some reason, we can't just enjoy somebody else's success. Somehow, that's going to affect us. If they have more, then I have less - and I don't know why. Ellen Degeneres
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I still have the shirt I wore my first time on Johnny Carson's show. Only now I use it as a tablecloth at dinner parties. It was very blousy. Ellen Degeneres
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I do have ADD and in real life, I'm all over the place and can hardly focus. If we were talking for, for more than an hour or so, I'd start drifting off... I can't sit still too long. Ellen Degeneres
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I have a terrible problem with procrastination... a friend told me, "Well, you should go to therapy." And I thought about it, but then I said, "Wait a minute. Why should I pay a stranger to listen to me talk when I can get strangers to pay to listen to me talk?" And that's when I got the idea of touring. Ellen Degeneres
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Above all, I strive to be the best I can - to be better than I was yesterday and better tomorrow. Ellen Degeneres
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I don't know who had the bright idea of teaching pneumonia how to walk, but I'd like to find that dunderhead before he decides he wants to teach it how to drive. Ellen Degeneres
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I have the picture of Barack [Obama] and me dancing right outside of my dressing room door, I see it every single day, and it makes me very happy. Ellen Degeneres
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I think people need to laugh everyday. Whether the economy is good or bad, I think the most important thing is to laugh and to feel positive, if you are laughing at something positive. But if you are laughing at mean jokes then it's a wash. Ellen Degeneres
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I don't want to get the same looks I give people when they get on a plane holding a baby: That's a cute baby, just keep walking, keep walking, keep going, keep going.... Ellen Degeneres
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I was in yoga the other day. I was in full lotus position. My chakras were all aligned. My mind is cleared of all clatter and I'm looking out of my third eye and everything that I'm supposed to be doing. It's amazing what comes up, when you sit in that silence. 'Mama keeps whites bright like the sunlight, Mama's got the magic of Clorox 2. Ellen Degeneres
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They say you just stand over there, he'll say thank you and you walk back off and that's what I thought was gonna happen, but in my head, I had for five or six years known that he was gonna call me over. Ellen Degeneres
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The good psychic would pick up the phone before it rang. Of course it is possible there was no one on the other line. Once she said God Bless you I said, I didn't sneeze She looked deep into my eyes and said, You will, eventually. And damn it if she wasn't right. Two days later I sneezed. Ellen Degeneres
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We stock up on popcorn and candy like we're crossing the Sierras, don't we? I'll have a couple of soft pretzels, a hot dog, Milk Duds, Snocaps. Is that the largest popcorn you've got there, that bucket? You don't have a barrel or anything like that? Do you have a donkey or a pack mule or anything? - Oh, and a Diet Coke. Ellen Degeneres
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