Bill Cosby Quotes & Wallpapers

Bill Cosby
Total Quotes: 411


I didn't know how serious it is to a female that you lift the lid. Bill Cosby

If you're a parent, the five worst words you can say to your children are, "When I was your age ..." You were never their age. You were older in the womb. Bill Cosby

Grandparents are God's gifts to children. Bill Cosby

You also notice that the right side of your face feels like it's sliding off of your skull. And your bottom lip is in your lap! Bill Cosby

...among the guitarists, Wes Montgomery is fantastic. He's always good to let you know what the art form is all about. It's the same still life that everybody is painting, but in comes Wes Montgomery, and it's right there! Bill Cosby

Meadowlark and I share a common vision of bringing joy and laughter to others. Bill Cosby

We parents ask dumb questions, therefore we get dumb answers. Bill Cosby

People will frighten you about a graduation.... They use words you don't hear often: And we wish you Godspeed. It is a warning, Godspeed. It means you are no longer welcome here at these prices. Bill Cosby

The weatherman is always right. It's just his timing that's off. Bill Cosby

People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what's bitter and move on. Bill Cosby

Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework. Bill Cosby

Sometimes you try to help people, and it backfires on you, and then they try to take advantage of you. Bill Cosby

I don't have a problem believing in God and Jesus. But in Genesis one has to wonder about these sentences that just go on and end without finishing. The thought is unfinished. Where did Adam go? What is he doing? Hello? There has to be some pages missing. Bill Cosby

You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it. Bill Cosby

...it was the arts, those noble expressions of the human spirit that are communicated through literature, dance, song, film, drama, painting and sculpture, among the many other such creative means, that helped articulate the sufferings of [these] people that were heard around the globe. Bill Cosby

There are certain times of the day when you need a balance - that is, your protein and your carbs. I'm a Barry Sears man. I believe that anything green is a carb, and I need 2:1. Two of the carbs to one of the protein. Bill Cosby

I am proud to be an American. Because an American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread. Bill Cosby

When you become senile, you won't know it. Bill Cosby

When you don't understand something, you often laugh. Bill Cosby

As I have discovered by examining my past, I started out as a child. Coincidentally, so did my brother. My mother did not put all her eggs in one basket, so to speak: she gave me a younger brother named Russell, who taught me what was meant by 'survival of the fittest.' Bill Cosby

I'm not the healthiest, but I am healthy. I'm healthy to the point where there are things that I have to eat that I don't want to eat, but I eat it because I'm enjoying staying alive. Bill Cosby

If you watch kids looking at something on television, even something that's produced for them and is supposed to be funny, what you'll notice is that they don't laugh. Bill Cosby

The problems with kids having short attention spans is driven by entertainment, reset buttons on games, games having to do with getting somewhere and heads blowing up. Everything is 'cut to the chase, cut to the chase.' Bill Cosby

I was put in remedial everything. Bill Cosby

I got into Temple University on a track scholarship. Bill Cosby

I've said all along I've never competed with 'The Simpsons.' Not in my own mind. Bill Cosby

Not many jobs are available for single women who just want to have babies. Bill Cosby

People have all kinds of approaches when they come up to me. Some of them are so nervous: 'You know, Mr. Cosby, you are my biggest fan!' I am? Some of them even claim that I raised them. Bill Cosby

'Don't worry about senility', my grandfather used to say. Bill Cosby

Romance is a different word than sexual contact. Bill Cosby

You can't be everything to everyone Bill Cosby

Calculus is one course you can come with to your parents and say, I am dropping it. And they'll understand. Bill Cosby

i was'nt always black. there was this freckel that just grew and grew... Bill Cosby

Some authority on parenting once said, "Hold them very close and then let them go." This is the hardest truth for a father to learn: that his children are continuously growing up and moving away from him (until, of course, they move back in). Bill Cosby

It is a warning, Godspeed. It means you are no longer welcome here at these prices. Bill Cosby

You can teach an old dog new tricks. You just don't want to see the dog doing them. Bill Cosby

There are no absolutes in raising children. In any stressful situation, fathering is always a roll of the dice. The game may be messy, but I have never found one with more joys and rewards. Bill Cosby

What best defines a child is the total inability to receive information from anything not plugged in. Bill Cosby

In spite of what Thomas Jefferson wrote, all men may be created equal, but not to all women. Bill Cosby

You go and you buy a lottery ticket. You've got just as much chance of getting struck by lightning as you do of winning the lottery. Bill Cosby

When ask you a question, you try and answer, they tell you to shut up! Day and night, night and day, work my fingers to the bone, for what? I don't... SHUT UP! And when I ask you a question, you keep your trap shut! Think I'm talking to hear myself talk? ANSWER ME! Bill Cosby

I tell my kids, This is not the same person I grew up with. You are looking at an old woman who is trying to get into Heaven. Bill Cosby

When you're a father you censor yourself. You get just as angry with a child but you don't want to say, "What the filth and foul and I'll filth and foul, filth and foul and, yeah, ya filth and foul face, and I'll filth and foul, foul, filth!" You don't want to say that to a child so you censor yourself and you sound like an idiot: "What the... Get your... I'll put a... Get out of my face!" Bill Cosby

There are two sides to every story, and sometimes three, four, and five. Bill Cosby

The absolute truth is that there is no power in celebrity. Bill Cosby

When my son was murdered, people asked me how I felt about God and what had happened to my son. I said, 'No, you can't go there. You have to understand that there is a devil, and he works 24/7. Whoever murdered our son was with the devil.' Bill Cosby

Nothing I've ever done has given me more joys and rewards than being a father to my children. Bill Cosby

For college seniors there should be a week of being allowed to cry. Just break down and cry because you are scared and don't know what's next. Bill Cosby

Parents are people who yell and they yell and they yell and they yell. And you already have the point... and they're still yelling. Bill Cosby

The most important educational vehicle in all life is a parent figure. Bill Cosby

Too many people are waiting for Jesus to come along and cut your grass. And Jesus isn't going to come along and cut your grass. Bill Cosby

Most of us learn to read by looking at each word in a sentence - one at a time. Bill Cosby

With my wife Camille's help, I took to social networking. I'm working with the computers. Bill Cosby

Racial humor was about 35% of my act when I first started. But I realized that it was a crutch. What brought it home was when another comedian said to me, 'If you changed color tomorrow, you wouldn't have any material.' He meant it as a put-down, but I took it as a challenge. Bill Cosby

'I Spy' represents the absence of the tension of the black man or black woman or anyone of that color walking in, so that the white racist person can become entertaining to a viewer. Bill Cosby

Tons of comedians have said, 'I grew up learning from Bill Cosby. He's great.' But that respect doesn't mean much to the young people. They like their ginger ale with hot sauce. Bill Cosby

Things are old. Parts are old. I'm talking about 'us' parts. AARP-parts. Some of us were born with stronger parts than others. Bill Cosby

If you can find humour in anything, you can survive it Bill Cosby

My children love my mother, and I tell my children, that is not the same woman I grew up with...That is an old woman trying to get into heaven now. Bill Cosby

Never say [to younger people] "that was before your time," because the last full moon was before their time! Bill Cosby

When you graduate from college, they tell you to follow your dreams. Does anyone say you have to wake up first? Bill Cosby

The heart of marriage is memories. Bill Cosby

Parents are not quite interested injustice, they are interested in quiet. Bill Cosby

The first time I came across the birds and the bees in actual flight, I couldn't identify the formation. Bill Cosby

The summit, which is set up to educate people about managing their money and protecting their income, leads to empowerment of self, for which this summit needs to be applauded. Bill Cosby

Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you're pouring, or drinking. Bill Cosby

If a white man falls off a chair drunk, it's just a drunk. If a Negro does, it's the whole damn Negro race. Bill Cosby

A father has to do everything in his power to keep a tight ship, even though he knows the crew would like to send him away in a dinghy. Bill Cosby

But if that's what you want to be, that's what you will be - as long as you study. Bill Cosby

My grandpa didn't believe in hugging and kissing, or saying I love you. His love had to do with the way he treated you. When he said, We're going here, we're going there, he was telling me about life. That was his love for me. My love for him was listening to what he said, keeping out of trouble, doing right, being fair. Bill Cosby



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