Anonymous Quotes & Wallpapers


Total Quotes: 4164


Hate is misguided love. Anonymous
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Truth fears no questions. Anonymous
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Always tell the truth. If you can't always tell the truth, don't lie. Anonymous
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A woman needs two animals - the horse of her dreams and a jackass to pay for it. Anonymous
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When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time. Anonymous
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A hug is the shortest distance between friends. Anonymous
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I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes. Anonymous
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Two things are infinite, as far as we know - the universe and human stupidity. Anonymous
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Treat everyone with politeness, even those who are rude to you - not because they are nice, but because you are. Anonymous
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A fellow who does things that count, doesn't usually stop to count them. Anonymous
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Don't wait for people to be friendly, show them how. Anonymous
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A kiss is just a pleasant reminder that two heads are better than one. Anonymous
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Kiss.... Not enough for one, just enough for two, and too much for three. Anonymous
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Her kisses left something to be desired... the rest of her. Anonymous
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Laughter is an orgasm triggered by the intercourse of sense and nonsense. Anonymous
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What a wonderful thing is the mail, capable of conveying across continents a warm human hand-clasp. Anonymous
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The human mind has never invented a labor-saving machine equal to algebra. Anonymous
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There was a young man from Trinity, Who solved the square root of infinity. While counting the digits, He was seized by the fidgets, Dropped science, and took up divinity. Anonymous
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Physicians and politicians resemble one another in this respect, that some defend the constitution and others destroy it. Anonymous
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Asthma is a disease that has practically the same symptoms as passion except that with asthma it lasts longer. Anonymous
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You have two chances - one of getting the germ and one of not. And if you get the germ you have two chances - one of getting the disease and one of not. And if you get the disease you have two chances - one of dying and one of not. And if you die - well, you still have two chances! Anonymous
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Don't just do something - sit there! Anonymous
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In the old days a man who saved money was a miser; nowadays he's a wonder. Anonymous
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Mommies are just big little girls. Anonymous
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Mirror, mirror on the wall, I am my mother after all. Anonymous
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Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't. Some can't. Anonymous
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Strong lager and some early Zep tunes. I ask thee, is there a better way to spend an evening? Anonymous
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May your bobbin always be full! Anonymous
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When I learned to sew, I forgot how to cook. Anonymous
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When life throws you scraps, make a quilt. Anonymous
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Sewing forever, housework whenever. Anonymous
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Quilters never cut corners. Anonymous
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Our lives are like quilts - bits and pieces, joy and sorrow, stitched with love. Anonymous
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Nurses can take the pressure. Anonymous
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You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that too stupid to live should be a diagnosis. Anonymous
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A pessimist's blood type is always B-negative. Anonymous
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A hole is nothing at all, but you can still break your neck in it. Anonymous
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Don't miss the donut by looking through the hole. Anonymous
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I think a photography class should be a requirement in all educational programs because it makes you see the world rather than just look at it. Anonymous
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When at night you cannot sleep, talk to the Shepherd and stop counting sheep. Anonymous
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Those who have lost an infant are never, as it were, without an infant child. Their other children grow into manhood and womanhood, and suffer all the changes of mortality; but this one alone is rendered an immortal child; for death has arrested it with its kindly harshness, and blessed it into an eternal image of youth and innocence. Anonymous
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Only Robinson Crusoe had everything done by Friday. Anonymous
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The man whose book is filled with quotations, may be said to creep along the shore of authors, as if he were afraid to trust himself to the free compass of reasoning. Anonymous
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How do we know that the sky is not green and we are all colour-blind? Anonymous
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Good company upon the road is the shortest cut. Anonymous
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There are three religious truths: 1) Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah. 2) Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith. 3) Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters. Anonymous
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Instead of being born again, why not just grow up? Anonymous
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The problem with fundamentalists insisting on a literal interpretation of the Bible is that the meaning of words change. A prime example is 'Spare the rod, spoil the child.' A rod was a stick used by shepherds to guide their sheep to go in the desired direction. Shepherds did not use it to beat their sheep. The proper translation of the saying is 'Give your child guidance, or they will go astray.' It does not mean 'Beat the shit out of your child or he will become rotten' as many fundamentalist parents seem to belive. Anonymous
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To a runner, a side stich is like a car alarm. It signifies something is wrong, but you ignore it until it goes away. Anonymous
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Runners just do it - they run for the finish line even if someone else has reached it first. Anonymous
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Prepare and prevent, don't repair and repent. Anonymous
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Be alert! Accidents hurt. Anonymous
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Better dead sure than sure dead. Anonymous
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Wishing won't keep you safe - safety will. Anonymous
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I have my own little world, but it's okay - they know me here. Anonymous
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A biophysicist talks physics to the biologists and biology to the physicists, but then he meets another biophysicist, they just discuss women. Anonymous
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Blessed are the children of scrapbookers, for they shall inherit the scrapbooks. Anonymous
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When life gives you scraps, make something with them. Anonymous
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Love is a matter of chemistry, but sex is a matter of physics. Anonymous
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Don't worry, it only seems kinky the first time. Anonymous
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I once knew a woman who offered her honor So I honored her offer And all night long I was on her and off her. Anonymous
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A Christmas shopper's complaint is one of long-standing. Anonymous
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If the shoe fits, buy it in every color! Anonymous
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The work will wait while you show the child the rainbow, but the rainbow won't wait while you do the work. Anonymous
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Only skydivers know why the birds sing. They never have to pack a parachute. Anonymous
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You know you're a skydiver when you show up at the drop zone even on the worst-weather days because at least you can sit around drinking beer. Anonymous
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Skip like the wind! Anonymous
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The world always looks brighter from behind a smile. Anonymous
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Every day you spend without a smile, is a lost day. Anonymous
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It takes seventeen muscles to smile and forty-three to frown. Anonymous
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